23 things I've learnt in 23 years

My birthday is in July, but I will be abroad, travelling and having the time of my life most likely when my birthday comes to be... and probably with not too much internet connection or time free to write a post. Maybe, maybe not.

But, I feel I have learnt so much in my (nearly) 23 years on this Earth. And so, before I turn 23 and learn much much more, time to get some thoughts out into the universe to create space for more lessons and more thinking.

So, here we go...

1. It is okay to let go: of things, of people, of places, of bad memories. You don't need to hold onto everything forever, and we only have so much space in our hearts and minds.

2. Don't forget to be a little bit spontaneous: as much as I love to live by a planner and a schedule, some flexibility is always essential.

3. Balance is more important than you think: yes, you can live off chocolate cake for a week, but is that a good thing to do? Actually... very tempting... but don't forget your greens.

4. Also, don't forget to balance your online time with your offline time. Both worlds are important; but don't forget to live in the real world, to enhance your online presence. It doesn't work both ways.

5. Make time to do things that don't seem so important, but in 5 years time, you will not regret doing. Like having a blog, being a hobby photographer, watching sunset or going to yoga class. Buying the scented candle. Worth the money and the time.

6. It is okay to feel grief, to feel loss and pain and complete heart-wrenching sadness. I feel it while souls I love are even still alive, still attached to this world. I feel it for souls who left this world years ago, but who still remain with me every day. We never let those we care about go, we carry them in our hearts. Sometimes, the weight of all those we carry can get too much, and we can feel too tired. It's okay to let the tears spill. But, once you're done, pick yourself up and live life in their honour. Yes, we will lose people we love, but we can waste our precious moments already grieving them before they are gone, or we can use this time to make the memories we will hold in our hearts forever, even after they are gone. Perhaps, after we are gone too. Don't live with regret. Don't leave a phone call until it's too late. Don't forget to say I love you. Don't forget to spend time together. It could haunt you for the rest of your life, from personal experience.

7. It's equally important to feel happy as it is to feel other emotions. Don't put pressure on yourself to be only "worthwhile emotions" all the time. It's just not reality.

8. If you don't like a song, don't listen to it. If you don't like a TV show, don't watch it. If you don't like kale, don't eat it. Don't crumble to societal pressure, don't feel like you need to be a certain way, don't feel like you have to like what everyone else likes.

9. Travel, experiencing new things, and being out of your comfort zone are all lessons worth teaching yourself. Don't forget to indulge in moments to develop yourself, even if it seems like a waste of time or money.

10. Trust your gut: if you don't feel comfortable in a situation, have a good feeling about a particular person or have a bad feeling, trust it. You know more than you think you do, and your opinions and feelings are worth being trusted.

11. Find the things you love, and do them frequently, for maximum life enjoyment.

12. Learn to let go of grudges, and be the bigger person. Learn to be good at recognising your mistakes, and that it is okay to be wrong sometimes, as long as you apologize. But, on the flip side, see when you are being taken for a ride, and stand up for yourself.

13. Find your zen. Find your way to de-stress. Stress is poison for the body. Do not let it overcome you, and don't feel like stress = success. The two don't correlate at all.

14. Live as close to the things that make you happy. Be it the ocean, the mountains, the city, your family, your friends... proximity to the things we hold most dear is imperative.

15. Don't compare yourselves to others; they aren't you and they will never be you. You are brilliant in your own right. If anything, compare yourself to your past self, and see where you want your future self to be, and travel towards that.

16. Make little changes every day, to become a better person tomorrow. Rome wasn't built in a day, and your best self won't be either.

17. Don't take on more than what you can handle. Make it about quality, not quantity. It's okay to not want to work 6 days a week, it's okay to take breaks, it is okay to not want to be busy all the time. In fact, these things are more important than you know.

18. Don't take yourself too seriously. We are all fumbling through life, and no one is certain. We are doing pretty great.

19. Sometimes being lost, is where we become most found. Don't forget to get a little off the path sometimes; maybe you'll find a greener pasture.

20. Low tides are followed by high tides, so even if today is not your day, tomorrow might be. Always stick it out; better things are coming. Patience and resilience is truly a goddamn virtue. Take the lows and the highs. Take every moment, you can learn from anything if you keep your mind open.

21. This has all been rather deep, but truly recognising your growth and enjoying who you have become and how far you have come in this life is a beautiful, empowering thing. Embrace your growth.

22. It's okay to be hurt. It's okay to be hurt by lies, by harsh actions from other people. It's okay to be disappointed in people. You don't have to be perfectly resilient all the time. The people we love the most sometimes hurt us the most. Keep loving, keep loving fiercely. But, don't forget to love yourself the most, and don't be afraid to retract, to give space, to protect yourself. If someone is doing you damage, be prepared to walk away. You don't have to fix everyone. You can't fix everyone. Help those who can be helped, but don't hurt yourself in the process.

23. Smile, laugh, be merry. This life is so precious and fragile, so don't get caught up in the negative things. It's all about perspective. Re-train yourself to find the joy.

Thanks for reading. Big love!